Advice to anyone who wants to be a good motherInitially I was not a fan of Leonardo DiCaprio. I have never seen the classic movie “Titanic” in its entirety for many reasons, one of which is I know how it ends. However, I’ve have seen parts of the movie as I use my remote to channel surf. The scenery of the ship and the elegance of a bygone era were wonderfully recreated by director James Cameron. However, I was not sold on Leonardo DiCaprio. Sure he was young and some would say also handsome, but you have to have talent. Let me stop and just say that I was wrong – big time! He has developed into an enormous talent and great actor. I’ve seen him in “Catch me if you can”, “The Aviator”, “Blood Diamonds”, “The Departed” and the list goes on and on. He is now in a movie entitled, “J. Edgar” - a movie about J. Edgar Hoover, the once enormously powerful head of the FBI.The interesting thing that I discovered as I was reading about him and the movie, “J. Edgar,” was that he had a very powerful mother as did J. Edgar Hoover. However, he characterized the difference between their two mothers this way:

The difference was that Hoover’s mother told him what to do and mymother listened to me,” he said. “My mother was incredibly supportive.She wasn’t a stage mom and really didn’t care either way if I was an actor.She listened to this arrogant little kid saying that he wanted to be an actorand didn’t laugh in my face.

As I read this, I thought of all of the mothers in the world who have taken their sons and daughters lives seriously and listened to them. There is no greater feeling than being heard and understood. It is my feeling that genuine love is listening to someone – paying attention. When you are listening, you are loving and when you are not listening, you are too caught up in your own life and what is happening to you. Listening to your children is not about you, it’s about supporting them in their goals and in their dreams.“Those who have ears, let them hear!”